My client today was distraught. She has been saving paperwork for decades that she realizes now she never needed to keep. For a few weeks now, she has been very harsh with herself while we have done our weeding. No matter how much I tell her that her problem is a very common one, she’s not even one of the worse cases I’ve seen, and that she should give herself a break, she keeps berating herself for hanging on to all these things. I have been trying to impress upon her that the only reason the papers have built up so much is that she went years without ever looking at them, and she doesn’t need to ever let that happen again. But all she can focus on is how “stupid and pathetic” she has been for keeping them all this time.
I came home from our session today, and I thought about how I’d spend the rest of the afternoon and evening. I remembered that I’d been meaning to do some gardening for a couple of days, but other things kept intervening. Now, as I got out of my car, I thought, “But I’d need to change out of my work clothes into my gardening clothes, and I really need to use the weed whacker but I’ve never done it before, and it looks like it might rain….” Then, probably with my client still on my mind, I realized that I didn’t need to do it all, I just needed to do some. I could always wash my clothes if they got dirty. And it couldn’t hurt to just get out the weed whacker and see how hard it was to use.
I spent about an hour out there, whacking (super easy and fun), weeding, transplanting, and watering. As I dug the dandelions, plantain, and other interlopers out of my lawn, I felt bad about how many weeds there were.* Did I do an inadequate job last spring and summer? Did I wait too long this year to get at them? I wondered if they would reseed and multiply faster than I could pull them out. I pulled out a small bucket’s worth and dumped them into the lawn waste bag. It was hard to stop, seeing how much more work had to be done, but it had to be enough. I had other things to do. I could do more tomorrow, weather permitting.
I don’t think I need to say anything more. Time to change out of my dirty clothes. 🙂
*Yeah, I live with other people, but no one else weeds the lawn. Either they don’t care much, or they assume I’ll do it.